Its been two years since I spent a proper Diwali with crackers ,pudu dress, ofcourse cable TV movies), a proper Navrathri with our usual 5 storey golu bomma sets, hordes of maamis haunting our house and being forced to visit their houses and put under extreme tortures of singing my off key ,long forgotten carnatic songs. Its been 2 years since I celebrated a proper Krishna Jayanthi with plenty of home cooked sweets (unfortunately I dont happen to like most of the sweets) or a proper Karthikai deepam or ganesh Chaturthi. Yes, for tha past 2 years, I was completely absent form my home and dint have any opportunity to witness any of the trademark Hindu festivals which turned my house upside down when I was growing up there.
This came out as a surprise for me yet when I was thinking about the absence of cultural elements, of joyous festivities in my present life and lamenting the fact that I may never in future get that chance to participate in those again, there came a sense of peace and relief instead of worry and yearning. Being brought up in an orthodox (well, almost orthodox) Tam Brahm family, I was forced into participating all the usual religious rituals and festivals which I did with an air of complete indifference. THis has even started many disputes in my family as I happened to be unfortunate enof to not like things that are liked by all. i hate having guests at home, I am eco concious and forbid to bursting crackers on Diwali and I dont like sweets that I am forced to eat on every function. My mom has indeed taken pains to explain to me their significance yet it has failed to reach me as I could no longer connect them with the modern world we are all living in.
For example, NAvrathri festival which signifies the end of demon mahisaasura by godess Durga is a great ,enormous festival in India. It was also a great torture I had to endure every year. I cant understand why people still dont get the inconvineances of celebrating with golus is (>>> and != ) the intended meaning to inculcate the spirit of worshipping the GOdess Shakti in her differnt forms on the 9 days. It is a foremost chance for girl children to be tortured. I can hardly forget the times when my mom's ardent enthusiasm led her to dress me up in various veshams of Krishna and Rama (yes, with the flute , bow n arrow etc)and send me off to be admired to various houses of neighbourhood maamis, where I was to be owwwed and aawwwed at in my dad's veshti and an unforcomtable kondai complete with peacock feathers,to which I honestly cant accept the justification that Lord Krishna really arrives in our homes to admire the innocence and beauty of these child Krishnas ( I bet the children hated every single minute of the costume party and were cursing the God himself).
No.2, The popularity of distributing sundals, redistributing soap seepu kannadis that was already given by others, discriminating ppl on blouse bit issues might have been acceptable once upon a time as it served as the only source of entertainment , gossip, a fun fare for the brahmin women till mid 20th century.
But now it is merely an absolute waste of time and energy to have these extra pains of saravana stores shopping or calling on neighbours (whom we genrally hate), keeping track of beetal leaves and blouse bits amidst the usual strenuous household chores after a hectic day at work. I bet women now invisibly cry out in pain everytime a visiting maami insists on singing a huge krithi (which are now a days getting uncalled for ) and worse, prompting the hostess to sing an aarathi. The memory of my mom desparately trying to manage the guests, checking on sundal stockage while I am shouting for her help with homework still brings me a smile (ofcourse I am later to be scolded for not helping her out with chasing those maamis sooner by distributing the sundals earlier).
Its just that a lot of such traditions and rituals though meant well in earlier days are becoming completely useless in these changing times of the IT world. People, in the name of conservatism just dont realise the importance of moving forward and adapting to these changes . It is not that our traditions should be forgotten but why not change the rituals more suitable for today yet restoring the essense and spirit of the festivals?
Now, I have atlast found my peace with the dassara days. I do worship each of the significant Godesses on all those days privately, enjoy the beautiful golus at the temple and eat sundal prasadam for 1 day. how much more fun can Dassera get now that am even beginning to like sundal?!
3 comments:
s rt, de other day, I told u , v r living in our minds;
s, today , on 21.7.08, the same day u wrote dis, I was thinking that festivals and huge ceremonies are, like peace-time activities, PROSPERITY-TIME ACTIVITIES, as in prosperous countries, they rear animals, file cases on behalf of their pets etc., For average- income earners and poor, festivals are actually financial strain ; and naturally all other strains. But on a small-scale, festivals may be enjoyable. But not all children dislike festivals; a lot do like amd wait for them to happen.
in the hectic days of IT, as u call it, these festivals r the welcome time of relief and laughter in the otherwise mechanical world for me and m immediate family. i love every single one of them.... can associate only pleasant memories with them!
its definitely not relief for me... its yearning...
its not a matter of hatred or dislike. ITs just that the strain of doing it in the old ways, which may be of terribly inconvineance to some ppl can erase the charm of the celebrations itself. as festivals are only meant to be enjoyed with our near and dear ones in our own ways, rather than obeying some orthodox rules and rituals that doesnt make sense anymore..
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