I never get on well with most of the elderly elite. No, that would be wrong, actually I never get on with them at all.Not that I dont like to, never , but I always end up in the wrong side of those convos and bearing the brunt of a scolding.Even a slightly loose comment can result in a lecture long enough to make me sit through a history class. A lot of people in age>50 are super obnoxious and judgemental and opinionated that they love to drown the listeners in their wordly views of wisdom. especially the youngsters. If you are in school, the topic is "college admissions, board exams, future prospects etc etc" and voila, i 'll be given a lenghty talk abt the achievements of their prodigal kids.even worse the advice that follows "you see, CBSE is useless, no marks guaranteed, do not take **** engineering, there is no market.." and so goes on the list of ridiculous statemetns whose knowledge they obtained from their neighours brothers grandchildren or worse,Sun TV news . They never tire until you obey them point blank.One of my aunts was so adamant that I should take up State board in class 11.She was such a pestering nuisance that she managed to block me even when I go to the bathroom and give me another of her carreer talks . Why the hell do these people have to pound us repeatedly with their views if saying them once is enough for all? I understand the concern and caring part but come on, its MY life, my decisions to make.
Surprisingly, its not even the parents in most cases who give such constant headaches but the next relatives circle. Unknown uncles and aunts sprout up from nowhere and literally queue up to talk to u. Opinions are welcome if the source is any worthy of delivering it. Usually grandmothers are easiest to manage. They are happy enough if you oblige them with a prompt attendence and eat a jumbo lunch at their place. I have been winning my grandmom's favour just for banging her door once a day and demanding tea/tiffin. Just hang around fr a while, murmur "ahan".."oho"..at frequent intervals during their monologues of God knows what, and just take off exactly half hour later. Thats it, I am always her favourite grandchild.I become too perfect to have the need of her advice at all.
Even the advice problem can be tolerated, but some impertinent comments cannot. I respect some elders just for their age if not anything else. But my good manners were tested a bit too much by a 70 year old thatha .Due to my mom's ill health last December, I was given the thooku and entrusted with the task of getting food at a godforsaken time of 6.30 am on every morning of my "vacation" from a entrepreneur- maami supplying sambar,rasam etc. to office goers . She had the most annoying father who sits on the pillion every morning and loves to vambu alathufy with the customers. I, unfortunately was his frequent target. With a superior attitude which can be justified for his age, he drills me with a quiet ferocity. Once it went out of hand.
thatha: Which school are you studying in?
me: school illa college.
thatha (raised brows) : oh, is it? which college?
This was a tricky question.I can either tell the truth and hear another tirade of "oh, y Singapore? there are so many good colleges here, why did u leave ur parents? bla bla" or lie. I chose to lie.
me : Cresent Engineering college.
thatha:( seemed satisfied for a moment, but only for a moment) now a days, everyone is doing engineering. its overflowing. no market for IT , u know? ......(on&on&on &on for next 10 min. used to this reply, I almost fell asleep . then suddenly asks) why have you come to buy food? pommanaati ponnu, nee yen samaika matengara? idha kaalathla yarukum samaika therila....
damn it, just when i was congradulating myself of avoiding the college controversy, i landed in this mess. It was in the tip of my tongue to ask him to mind his own bizness. Since the thatha was coughing while speaking, I restrained, not wanting him to argue longer with me. and then the punch question arrives.
thatha : do u have any brothers?
me: no. just a sister.
thatha: paavam un appa amma. payyan irundha kadasi varaikum kaapathuvan, rendum ponna pochu.
That was THE last straw.I was stunned. This old useless guy was judging me, torturing me with advice,insulting me and now pitying my parents.Maybe in ancient years, one can understand that sentiment. But now? Did he even remember that he was living in his daughter's charity and not his son's? I am dismissed as useless just bacause m a girl? I still dont know how I managed to get back home without causing him any harm.But even I couldnt resist "paavam unga kozhanthel" before walking out.They say Old is Gold, but sometimes, its just irritating rusted crumbs.
i am not stereotyping here. My point is that people cannot expect to be worshipped and obeyed just because of the age factor. Though in our culture, anyone elder is to be respected, they should know better than to misuse the treatment.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
College pressures
Recently there were 2 suicide cases in NTU that occured within days apart from each other. Both were from the dept of EE . Obviously, it was a field day for the media. Infact, they got so excited over the item that they fabricated fantastic stories form the scraps of info the university cudnt manage to supress. Nevertheless, the underlying fact that alarmed the people was the killer stress level among the university students today. Though the situation may seem quite exagerrated to warrant suicide, the pressure can seriously cripple the students to some extent. My own college is a champion in supplying such treatment.
One such method of unjustifiable torture today is the threat of accomodation. You see, there are about 33000+ students studying here. OF which over 12000+ are international students. THe hostels in the campus can accomodate around 8000 students only. No one knows why the management doesnt take any measure to construct more hostels or what they do with our exorbitant fee. So, in their typical problem solving way, how do they manage the situation ?its simple. each undergraduate student has to do some CCAs where the are given points. SO, at the year end, all the students bid for the available hostels with these points and the ones having more than the cut off points are kept in , the rest are booted out.
this mock contest nicely places the fault on the students for not securing enouf points to win their hostel instead of the management having to look bad for not having enough accomodation. And so, every year this intense fight to have a roof over our head begins and the students flock to do any stupid activity in the name of cca to scrap the points. THe story of these CCAs are more interesting. Though some of them are quite useful and meaningful, the amount of work extracted from each club through the entire year can rival the study schedule put out by the university.
One can call the situation a healthy one, exposing the students to academics as well as extra curricular giving an overall balence blah blah blah crap. It would have been so,if this game isnt dirty; if the university could resist bullying the students a little more. Last year the so called cut off was increased dramatically without any clue. NOTE 1 : the cut off points are released only after all the cca points are finalised at the year end and so, if u are unfortunate to fall below the mark, its just bad luck.Note 2: some clubs emulate indian politics very well-promise great amt of points, get all the work done,forget abt the deal. note 3: The situation gets worse each year, with the hostel fee hike and the competition evn more maddening.
This mad scramble takes the joy out of the entire scheme of ccas. People are forced to perform the most stupidest,atrocious activities and some arts clubs go far enough to bully the members to buy tickets for their mediocre shows. At the end of the day, it just sucks.
With this added pressure of doing time-consuming work after a tiring day,cope up with academics and when finally booted out without a second thought of one's financial situation by the management into the SG streets,not many poeple 'd be sane enough to avoid the depression black hole . How can the university expect the students to ace the exams when they cannot even guarantee them the basic facilities of life? Well, we are taught one true lesson well form an early age.. "when the going gets tough, the tough get going".
One such method of unjustifiable torture today is the threat of accomodation. You see, there are about 33000+ students studying here. OF which over 12000+ are international students. THe hostels in the campus can accomodate around 8000 students only. No one knows why the management doesnt take any measure to construct more hostels or what they do with our exorbitant fee. So, in their typical problem solving way, how do they manage the situation ?its simple. each undergraduate student has to do some CCAs where the are given points. SO, at the year end, all the students bid for the available hostels with these points and the ones having more than the cut off points are kept in , the rest are booted out.
this mock contest nicely places the fault on the students for not securing enouf points to win their hostel instead of the management having to look bad for not having enough accomodation. And so, every year this intense fight to have a roof over our head begins and the students flock to do any stupid activity in the name of cca to scrap the points. THe story of these CCAs are more interesting. Though some of them are quite useful and meaningful, the amount of work extracted from each club through the entire year can rival the study schedule put out by the university.
One can call the situation a healthy one, exposing the students to academics as well as extra curricular giving an overall balence blah blah blah crap. It would have been so,if this game isnt dirty; if the university could resist bullying the students a little more. Last year the so called cut off was increased dramatically without any clue. NOTE 1 : the cut off points are released only after all the cca points are finalised at the year end and so, if u are unfortunate to fall below the mark, its just bad luck.Note 2: some clubs emulate indian politics very well-promise great amt of points, get all the work done,forget abt the deal. note 3: The situation gets worse each year, with the hostel fee hike and the competition evn more maddening.
This mad scramble takes the joy out of the entire scheme of ccas. People are forced to perform the most stupidest,atrocious activities and some arts clubs go far enough to bully the members to buy tickets for their mediocre shows. At the end of the day, it just sucks.
With this added pressure of doing time-consuming work after a tiring day,cope up with academics and when finally booted out without a second thought of one's financial situation by the management into the SG streets,not many poeple 'd be sane enough to avoid the depression black hole . How can the university expect the students to ace the exams when they cannot even guarantee them the basic facilities of life? Well, we are taught one true lesson well form an early age.. "when the going gets tough, the tough get going".
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)